Fearless Child Molestors Or Pardon Me, But Your Penis Is In My Butt

The Sex Pistols - "The Great Rock 'N' Roll Swindle" (1979)

Well my oh my if yesterday's Friday mp3 shuffle wasn't very unpopular.

Only 13 people have downloaded it, and usually the Friday mixes are very popular and get more than twice that amount within just the first few hours. How come, people? Not enough big names for you, ol' chap? A bit too obscure, squire?

Then let me explain a thing or two: It has Breach on it, the most ass-ripping hardcore band this side of His Hero Is Gone. It has Acid Bath, trendsetter for a whole generation of sludge bands. It has grindcore band Social Infestation, starring Mastodon's Troy Sanders. It has the fashionable punkers du jour Fucked Up. It has Naked City, an insane freeform jazz/grindcore project unlike anything made before or since.

It has Icepick, Jamey Jasta's sideproject that smokes his main band Hatebreed like nobody's business. It has a song by Marduk, easily one of the top five black metal bands in history. It has Steve Albini's Big Black, noise rock gods of old. Last but not least it has an epic track by Boredoms, the best band to ever come out of Japan. No, correction: the best to ever come out of all of fucking Asia.

So why don't you correct your mistake and click here and download my Friday MP3 Shuffle #30 and rock out like there's no tomorrow. It's fucking brilliant and it deserves your attention.

Are we all clear on that? Good, then let's move on.

In early 1978 frontman Johnny Rotten quits The Sex Pistols after a disastruous U.S. tour, sick of the situation in general and manager Malcolm McLaren in particular. Shortly thereafter Julian Temple goes to work on the Pistols "documentary" (in quotes because I use that word very loosely) The Great Rock 'N' Roll with McLaren and the remaining band members Steve Jones (guitar), Sid Vicious (bass) and Paul Cook (drums). Rotten wants nothing to do with it.

The film was a higly fictional retelling of the band's history, which more than anything showcases McLaren's penchant for creating myths. Never let the truth get in the way of a good story and all that. Take everything in the film with a grain of salt. It was decided some new music must be recorded for the film, and the remaining trio set forth writing new material.

Jones, Vicious and Cook all took turns singing on these new songs, and hired (of all people) notorious train robber Ronnie Biggs to sing on two tracks, including Belsen Was A Gas, penned by Vicious. McLaren also conributes a bit in the vocal department, and Edward Tudor-Pole (who was Rotten's replacement for about half an hour when the band still considered going on without him) sings a couple as well.

Of all these singers I must say Vicious is my favorite. Sure, he can't stay in key to save his life, but that was never very important in punk rock, was it? He has just the snotty, bratty attitude necessary to get the job done. Whereas Jones and Cook sound insecure behind the mic, Vicious' sneering delivery (somewhere between Rotten and Joey Ramone) fits perfectly. He couldn't sing very well, he could barely play and he only had one song to his name, but he became the blueprint for all punks ever since for a reason. The guy just had something about him, let's face it.

While Never Mind The Bollocks is of course the big classic, I'll continue to make a case for The Great Rock 'N' Roll Swindle any chance I get. Yes, it's an obvious last cash-in attempt by a manipulative, money hungry demon of a manager and the album is so erratic because the band was in shambles (in fact they didn't even exist anymore at this point), and they had lost not only their lyricist and frontman, but also their direction. So what do you do? You cobbled together whatever shit you find, that's what.

But the fact remains that this soundtrack has an even bigger fuck off-attitude than their only "real" album, as by releasing this album they told even their fans, as well as punk conventions in general, to fuck off. On Never Mind The Bollocks they may have proclaimed "And we don't care!" but they didn't fully live up to it until this one came along.

It's total anarchy, a big fucking surreal mess of new songs without their singer mixed with old demo recordings featuring their singer and old demo recordings of their old singer with newly recorded backing tracks. Strange covers, their hit songs sung in French or reworked into disco medleys, orchestral reworkings of well known Pistols material, and let's not forget the bawdy traditional Friggin' In The Riggin', sung by Jones. Maybe the best song ever recorded.

Some of the new songs deserve an extra mention: Silly Thing (download below) sung by Cook has a Clash/Buzzcocks feel with an adorable chorus unlike anything the band recorded with Rotten and is an excellent precursor to what Cook and Jones would later do in their short lived band The Professionals, a band I rate much higher than Rotten's post-Pistols endeavor Public Image Ltd. The Professionals only recorded one album, I Didn't See It Coming in 1981, but golly what an album it is. I'll make a post about that one too some day, in the meantime you can download this compilation I made on my other blog which includes one of their songs.

The tracks recorded during the Never Mind The Bollocks demo sessions in 1976 are pretty damn sweet too though. My personal favorite is the Dave Berry cover Don't Give Me No Lip, Child with the most venomous guitar riff this side of The Stooges. The cover Paul Revere's (I'm Not Your) Steppin' Stone, most famous in The Monkees' version, is absolutely staggeringly fantastic.

The film, which was just as ramshackle and lost & found as its soundtrack, was released in 1980 and with that the story of The Sex Pistols was over. Apart from the expected dead horse flogging of McLaren of course, who tried to milk every penny out of the band for a few more years.

The Pistols would eventually reunite in the mid 90s with their original bass player Glen Matlock, but let's pretend that never happened, shall we?

Yes, let's.

(mp3) The Sex Pistols - Silly thing (recommended!)
(mp3) The Sex Pistols - (I'm not your) steppin' stone (recommended!)
(mp3) The Sex Pistols - Don't give me no lip, child
(mp3) The Sex Pistols - C'mon everybody
(mp3) The Sex Pistols - Friggin' in the riggin' (recommended!)

Buy The Great Rock 'N' Roll Swindle @ Amazon.com

The Friday MP3 Shuffle #30

Doobie doobie doo doo! Dooooweeeeeeeeeba dooobah! Doodoodoodoodoodooo boogie woogie doodoo woopie doo! Dum de dum dum de dum! Doooobie doobie doo doo dum de dum! Squappy dappy doopy doo doo doodiddly dum de dum!

(zip) MP3 Shuffle #30 (44 mb)

1. Ronny Köhler - Now I lay thee down (2009)
2. Breach - Old ass player (2001)
3. Acid Bath - Jezebel (1994)
4. Social Infestation - Helpless hopeless (2000)
5. Fucked Up - What could have been (2004)
6. Masachist - Inborn obedience (2009)
7. Naked City - Bonehead (1990)
8. Big Dumb Face - Organ splitter (2001)
9. Icepick - Nothing without loyalty (2006)
10. Marduk - Into utter madness (2009)
11. Big Black - Bad penny (1987)
12. Boredoms - Super going (1998)

Buy 'em all @ Amazon.com, why don'cha.

Dillinger Escape Plan studio report

The lads in The Dillinger Escape Plan are currently in the middle of recording their fourth full-length Option Paralysis with Steve Evetts, their usual producer. From what has been released so far (snippets of demos, studio diary etc), we can draw two conclusions:

1. Their new drummer Billy Rymer is a beast.
2. The album will be awesome.

Released some time next year.



A demo snippet:


Another demo snippet:

(mp3) DEP - Breed (Nirvana cover)
Live in 2002.

(mp3) DEP - Baby's first coffin
Available on Miss Machine (2004)

(mp3) DEP - Like I love you (Justin Timberlake cover)
Available on Plagiarism (EP, 2006)

(mp3) DEP - Lurch
Available on Ire Works (2007)

Shhhhhhh! Samples from albums not yet released. Don't tell anyone!

This is very hush hush, folks. I can't really tell you about this little collection I've put together. The web sheriff and the records label would have me tarred and feathered for posting this.

I'll tell you this much though: This zip file most certainly doesn't contain some samples from a legendary and often photoshopped Norwegian black metal or an American death metal band that likes Egypt a whole lot! No siree!

It also has no tracks from a band whose name implies a female baron, or a sludge/doom duo whose name would be something like "Really Really Dark Venomous Snake". It also has nothing by a Swedish death metal band whose frontman used to sing in Bloodbath and has a crap sideproject called Pain.

Hell no! Nothing of the sort! Not me!

(zip) Samples from albums not yet released (27 mb)

The history of Mastodon (re-post)

(I may have managed to get the new computer working and the internet going in the new apartment, but I still have to get off my lazy ass and load the dozens of gigabytes of music from the old computer into the new one, and as soon as I've done that I can get back to posting as usual. So while I continue to procrastinate for a while, here's a repost of my Mastodon history lesson from April 6th.)

The list of bands the members of Mastodon have been in, or are still in, is pretty long and I've compiled the essential ones in more or less chronological order (not 100% chronological, but close enough), ranging from about 1994 to 2009.

At the end of this compilation I threw in one Mastodon track each from 9 Song Demo, Call Of The Mastodon, Remission, Leviathan and Blood Mountain to round it off in style.

Eric Saner (original vocalist) - Sang on the 9 song demo in 2000, and was one of two vocalists in A Death Between Seasons around 1997/98.

Troy Sanders (bass, vocals) - Played bass and performed backing vocals in Four Hour Fogger between about 1995 and 1999. Does the same thing in Social Infestation since 1997.

Brent Hinds (guitar, vocals) - Played guitar and performed backing vocals in Four Hour Fogger between about 1995 and 1999. Is currently the vocalist and lead guitarist in Fiend Without A Face, The Blood Vessels and West End Motel.

Bill Kelliher (guitar) - Played guitar in Butterslax in the early 90s, played guitar in Lethargy between 1995 and 1999, played bass in Today Is The Day in 1999.

Brann Dailor (drums) - Played drums in Lethargy between 1992 and 1999, played drums in Today Is The Day in 1999.

I think that about wraps it up. If I got any dates wrong, feel free to correct me. Also if you have any tracks by Knuckle (the band Troy was in in the early 90s and became Four Hour Fogger when Brent joined) let me know.

(zip) The history of Mastodon (96 mb)

1. Butterslax - Freezer burnt
2. Butterslax - Nursey
3. Butterslax - Slice

4. Lethargy - Little man
5. Lethargy - Humor me
6. Lethargy - Create

7. Four Hour Fogger - Triracial isolates
8. Four Hour Fogger - Victim eyes
9. Four Hour Fogger - Test of toast

10. Social Infestation - The Dirty Harry syndrome
11. Social Infestation - Black
12. Social Infestation - Kill or be killed

13. A Death Between Seasons - Barely reaching zero
14. A Death Between Seasons - Deconstructing the archangel

15. Today Is The Day - In the eyes of God
16. Today Is The Day - Spotting a unicorn
17. Today Is The Day - Who is the black angel?

18. Fiend Without A Face - Calypso
19. Fiend Without A Face - Bank robbin' bandits
20. Fiend Without A Face - New York

21. The Blood Vessels - Bite
22. The Blood Vessels - I was gonna do it
23. The Blood Vessels - Debris

24. West End Motel - Come bearing gifts
25. West End Motel - Oh I'm on my way

26. Mastodon - We built this come death (demo)
27. Mastodon - Battle at sea
28. Mastodon - Trilobite
29. Mastodon - Ísland
30. Mastodon - Siberian divide

Buy 'em @ Amazon.com.

Patrick Swayze, 1952 - 2009

An mp3 shuffle + moving pics

Some (Claire The Poledancer, among others) have requested pics from the new apartment. I aim to please:


Proper moving attire (as issued by the European Union in 2006): Shoddy tattoo from the best band in the world, wristband from the worst band in the world and Evol Slippers Ov Doom from a famous Finnish homosexual.

The ability to effortlessly assemble IKEA book shelves is deeply ingrained in every Swede's DNA.

Thirty seconds later: Success! (I'm obviously an avid reader)

Thank you, IKEA! Of all enormous multi billion dollar furniture corporations founded by an old Nazi, you're my favourite!

The worth of every man is measured by the quality of his fridge magnets. Not surprisingly, I rank higher than most.

Even big strong IKEA assemblers need refueling. Here we have all basic food groups in one meal:
1. Water
2. Noodles
3. Orange phallic things
4. Girly bowl with blueberries on it

Another IKEA find: The dill pillow (aka The Dillow). It's not a home without it.

Picture frames named after the Swedish slang word for "Boner". I don't know why I like that so much.

The garden.

The watchdogs: Bowser, a monkey, The Phantom, a Gamorrean and Alf. Ain't nobody gonna break in here, motherfucker.

Enormous golf ball for a lamp? Check.
Not one, but two VCRs? Check.
Antique TV from the 80's by an obscure Italian manufacturer with possible mafia ties? Check!
Alright, that's more than enough. Here's some music:

(zip) Metal Bastard's MP3 Shuffle #29 (51 mb)

1. Randy - Chicken shack (2001)
2. Amebix - Slave (1985)
3. The Dillinger Escape Plan - Sunshine the werewolf (2004)
4. Municipal Waste - The art of partying (2007)
5. The Haunted - Chasm (1998)
6. Slayer - Behind the crooked cross (1988)
7. Morbid Angel - Eyes to see, ears to hear (1995)
8. Tragedy - Deaf and disbelieving (2006)
9. Turbowolf - Ancient snakes (2009)
10. Dirt Communion - Rebuilt for speed (2009)
11. Hearse - Cambodia (2004)
12. Killing Joke - Complication (Peel Session, 1980)
13. Nine Inch Nails & David Bowie - Scary monsters (and super creeps) (1995)
14. Mono - The flames beyond the cold mountain (2006)

Buy 'em all @ Amazon.com.

Kanye West is a cunt who needs to get his ass raped by nail-studded dildos for a week or two

I couldn't give two shits about MTV and their awards, and I don't even know who Taylor Swift is, but goddamn Kanye. This is an entirely new level of douchebaggery previously unknown to even the largest of douchebags.

This calls for a classic:

Dellamorte - "Uglier And More Disgusting" (1997)

Ahoy sailors!

Not a lot of updates around here as you may have noticed. As soon as I get my internet connection sorted out at the new apartment, I'll get back to posting as usual.

Meanwhile, for any of you who downloaded the Friday MP3 Shuffle Vol. 27 and enjoyed the track by a little band called Dellamorte, here's a treat for you.

Dellamorte was a Swedish death metal band which belonged firmly in the Entombed department of the genre. In other words, groovy rockin' death metal to shake your ass to. Dellamorte had more of a hardcorish, d-beat leaning though, though the comparison to their death 'n' roll brothers from Stockholm is fully valid.

But if Entombed were the fashionable darlings of Swedish death metal and got to be on television and magazine covers, Dellamorte were their paint-huffing country bumpkin cousins who spent most of their days drinking moonshine and cheap beer in the woods and lived in a dumpster behind Hells Angels' clubhouse. Inbred porn addicts who haven't showered in a year and have so much dry, crusty smegma on the tip of their foreskin they can't even piss straight.

Too much information? Sorry.

They released three albums before disbanding and members of the band have been found in Insision, Carnal Forge, Centinex, Regurgitate, Katatonia and many other bands worth checking out. Bassist Daniel Ekeroth wrote the excellent book Swedish Death Metal in 2007. Buy it here.

Uglier And More Disgusting was the second (and in my opinion best) album, produced by none other than Peter Tägtgren (Hypocrisy, Pain, Bloodbath). A great album which almost, almost made it onto my best 30 albums of the 90s countdown.

Enjoy, children.

(zip) Dellamorte - Uglier and more disgusting (30 mb)

1. Uglier and more disgusting
2. Sex machine
3. Miss Lords
4. Corpses
5. Lies
6. Fallen angel crashes dead
7. Dirty
8. Plug me in
9. Wretched
10. As much as you hurt me
11. 666 and pentagrams
12. So many reasons

The premature (again!) Friday MP3 Shuffle #28

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(zip) MP3 Shuffle #28 (53 mb)

1. High On Fire - Eyes and tooth (2002)
2. Mother Love Bone - Chloe dancer/Crown of thorns (1989)
3. Rainbow - Long live rock 'n' roll (1978)
4. Therapy? - Hey Satan you rock (2003)
5. Dozer - Rising (2003)
6. Backyard Babies - Babylon (1997)
7. Sleep - Dragonaut (1992)
8. Trans Am - City in flames (1999)
9. Stairland - Chung V (2003)
10. The Human Condition - Tear the walls down (2008)
11. Sengaija - Vad är det som låter? (1999)
12. Abhinanda - All of us (1997)
13. Mudhoney - Chain that door (1988)
14. Seigmen - Monument (1994)

Buy 'em all @ Amazon.com.